Trying harder to love myself

It’s an everyday struggle as anyone who suffers from body dysmorphia knows. I feel pretty in this picture even if I don’t look perfect.

What makes you feel pretty? I bought some sexy workout clothes to keep myself motivated. So far it’s just motivated me to take more full length selfies. Still a win if you ask me.

30lbs ⬇️2016-2019

I have struggled with bulimia for 20 years. I feel a tinge of jealousy when people tell me they “grew out of it” in their teens but I’m also happy for them. I’m better now than I ever was before and I take methylated b vitamins to contend with the anxiety I believe causes it.

I was never a binge eater, just a purger. For anyone struggling with it now, me and my five missing teeth are here to tell you it’s not worth it. I have good days and bad days, even good years and bad years–i also believe in myself.

The weight loss you see above is from redirecting my depression into healthy choices, not from purging (which makes me bloated and hungry)

Ideally I don’t care about losing more pounds. Just getting some muscle and maybe a more defined waist. Away we go!

Journey into booty building

I have dabbled in all sorts of exercises over the years. Thought about becoming a personal trainer because I love lifting (too introverted), went for a yoga teaching certification because I’ve practiced since I was a child (again, too introverted). Did few months of kickboxing. Took some aerobics.

Overall, I am bad at leaving the house.

This year I’ve resolved to combine my love of fitness with my love of staying at home.

  • To do list:
  • Buy a punching bag for the tree outback

    Teach my boyfriend what I know about kickboxing and yoga to fulfill my need for sharing what I know.
    Build a booty. All the rave, I know.

I already purchased this fitness band and so far I’m loving it. I build muscle in my legs fast so hopefully my butt will follow suit with the right exercise.

DMoose Resistance hip band

(Picture from brand post on

I’m excited to do this. He’s some booty befores.

Wish me luck! 💕

I never do this!

I finally want to share what I’ve learned in my personal experience with an accidental ketogenic diet and my health and mental wellness. I also want others to know vegetarian keto is not difficult and actually more enjoyable than a regular vegetarian diet—especially when you see the health benefits for someone with arthritis or anxiety. At least in my case, my achy joints and my racing heart stabilized significantly.